I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize