I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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