Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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