i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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