Betty ford says i'm here all night
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
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I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
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This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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