You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
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