lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize