Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize