So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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