so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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