it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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