Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
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