I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize