this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
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