Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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