That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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