other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
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