Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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