We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
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Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
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This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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