I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
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stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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