I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I woke up under a house in Key West
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize