I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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