Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize