i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
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I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
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I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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