Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
being pregnant is like rehab
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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