Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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