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In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
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