i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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