How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
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