I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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