Pants 0. Shit 1.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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