You work out of a Hotel?
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
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