Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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