You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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