Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize