If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
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Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
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Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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