Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
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I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
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Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
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