I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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