When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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