So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
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Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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