I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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