All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
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