It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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