yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Randomize