I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
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