I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize