i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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