He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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