I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize