There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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